What women think while having sex?

A Hollywood hunk, ex-lovers, a blue film scene and even what to buy in a grocery store—these are things that women think of while having sex.

Some women have now revealed what really scores with them between the sheets.

Single comedian Shazia Mirza, 34, said that some of her friends revealed that during sex they are mentally writing a to-do list, remembering clothes they have to wash, what they've got to buy at Tesco's or those shoes they love in Selfridges.

And some women even think of men they secretly fantasise of.

"A friend of mine, who really loves her husband, told me that during sex she can't help thinking about all the men she secretly really desires, like Jeremy Beadle and Jeremy Paxman," the Sun quoted her as saying.

"I've been married twice and had many lovers and to be honest, with past lovers I've been so bored in bed, I've taken to compiling mental grocery lists and calculating exactly how many shoes are in the wardrobe (82 pairs)," said author Kathy Lette, 51.

"Most wives are taken for granted. But how we'd like to be taken is by a muscular-thighed Adonis with pecs appeal.

"Luckily sex with Johnny Depp is only the flick of a light switch away. Ah, Johnny - a man whose sex appeal is so deadly it should be registered at police headquarters as a lethal weapon.

"Doing the horizontal tango with George Clooney is also amazing - if only he'd been with me at the time!" she added.

Sarah Millican, 33, is in a relationship, and she said: "I never walk out of a film at the cinema. I'm the same with sex. I always think it might get better. To be honest, as long as I've got a bag of Maltesers, I'm not going anywhere." source

Celebs who posed nude

Nakedness is still a very hush hush thing for lot of actresses to be portrayed on and off the screen. But there are babes who have no qualms about it. Have a look...

Eva Mendes: The sexy actress has posed nude for a noble cause for PETA and also to promote the fragrance 'Secret Obsession'Source:Times of India

 

Tips to up your sexual power

Try as you might, you can't escape it. Sex dominates everything — the media, our movies and drawing room conversations.

One of the most respected management guru Abraham Maslow's famous hierarchy of needs theory places sex at the very first level along with breathing, food, water, excretion, homeostasis and sleep. So lack of good sex can be directly equated with the effects of lack of good sleep or even a failure to have a good 'session' one morning!

A good sex life is part and parcel of healthy living. And what does this mean? It implies satisfaction with your partner and feeling sexually adequate. Also, a person who has a good sex life has good self-esteem and falls into the "I'm ok, you're ok category".

Scorch the bed
Interestingly, whether in Mumbai, Delhi, LA or Bangkok, most people who 'get lucky' assume that they are good in bed. That is, they believe they are able to satisfy their partners completely while satisfying themselves. But more than getting action, having a good sex life also means being able to last long enough to share a wonderful journey and yet not last so long that the journey turns into a punishment for the partner!

So what does it take to excel in bed as in other areas of life? As always, manwoman dynamics differ here too. While both have the need to be satiated, both take different routes for getting there. While a woman can have multiple orgasms and continue to have sex even after she's exhausted, a man normally goes limp after he orgasms. So for a man, being able to last long enough to satisfy his partner is the primary concern.

Also, don't get carried away by the 'quantity' factor. It's quality that matters. Sex needn't be restricted to contortions and gymnastics in bed or in the sweaty back seat of a car. It's also not just about the act. Sexuality starts from the moment of first contact (even if it's just eye contact) and continues throughout the relationship for how many ever minutes, hours, weeks, months, years or decades it may last.

Spice it up, dude
So how do you ensure your sex life is always rocking? Just remember these tips...
Look fit: A toned physique is undoubtedly the most potent turn-on. Even before the love-making session begins, the sight of toned abs, strong thighs and muscular arms makes you sexually desirable to your partner and starts the fire burning. Those who maintain a toned physique normally have higher confidence levels.

Be fit: A person who is fit is bound to have higher levels of stamina, strength, vitality and vigour than an unfit person. This is sure to catapult your sex life and even lead to higher satisfaction levels, for you and your partner alike. Obesity is one of the key physical reasons for erectile dysfunction. Therefore a fit person stands a better chance of satisfying his / her partner.

De-stress: Stress is one of the biggest killers of a healthy sex life as it leads to many problems, right from reduced stamina to simply not being in mood. So stay stress free. Remember, any problem is only as big as you allow it to be.

Eat right: Good sex demands a healthy diet with adequate zinc and proteins. Zinc is known for its aphrodisiac properties. Eat your way to a sizzling sex life with a diet rich in asparagus, onions, garlic and bananas.

Smell good: Aromas have the magical property of making your brain explode with sensations and feelings. Make sure you smell good at all times. If not for anything else, body odour and bad breath are repulsive to most people.

Dress well: Admit it, we are visual by nature. We always believe in what we see. So dress well, packaging is important. Don't forget the little details like nail polish, earrings, lipstick etc. Men, please don't ignore your accessories either. Most women tend to look at men's shoes very carefully.

Experiment: Don't restrict yourself in bed, experiment freely with your partner. If your partner suggests something you've never heard or dreamt off before, don't shoot down the idea harshly, it may stop him or her from giving any future suggestions. Explore each other with reckless abandon. It keeps the magic alive and the relationship ticking for years together.

Be genuine: Most of us are capable of identifying fake interest from the real thing. So be genuine in every aspect, it genuinely helps!

The always 'in' look
Ever noticed that the hottest male stars / models, etc normally appear hairless? Ever wondered why? The answer is simple: In pure marketing terms, their target audience is the female viewer. They appear hairless simply because it makes them look better and enhances their sex appeal.

So, while your demure Indian girl may never tell you this directly, do consider that just as you may like to see your woman hairless, smelling good, dressed well and fat free, your woman may also like to see you clean shaven, hairless, smelling good, well dressed, with a great body and dressed up just for her! What say, girls? source

Naked ?

How comfortable are you with nakedness? If not much, we share some easy tips to make you feel comfortable with nakedness!

You love to flaunt your body, but the need to be perceived as sexy sometimes leaves you insecure and vulnerable inside. Even the most confident woman is most often a bit uncomfortable with her body.

Model Megha Kawale agrees, "There is no woman in this world who is happy and content with her body. She's always complaining and every woman goes through the same insecurity. Earlier if someone used to catch me in a bikini, I would squirm. I used to call it a half naked shot."

With couples getting more health conscious these days, many don't mind going buff in front of their partner, but when it comes to public view, they shy away.

Take the case of actor Shefali Zariwala, who divulges, "I am otherwise very comfortable with my body and I do like to check myself out when I am alone by baring it all. I love to be in my natural state at home when I am alone, but forget the camera."

Women know very well that for men, what they see is almost as good as what they get. So we know giving them an eyeful is the trick to seduce them, yet most women fret getting naked in front of their beaus.

Marketing manager Gaurav Sharma says, "If a woman lets you see her naked, I feel that's already a bonus. I would feel blessed if that happens, but none of my girlfriends ever gave me that pleasure of admiring their bodies. I remember one of them even started crying when I put on the lights right after we made out."

Here are a few ways to make you could feel comfortable with nakedness in front of your partner...

Think good thoughts: Whether or not you want to undress depends on your mental quotient. Your state of your mind rules your sex appeal. One can feel attractive even in the most hideous dress, if the mind is in a confident and happy state. "When you yourself feel sexy, that's when all the magic happens," says Megha.

"A guy is very much responsible for making a girl feel sexy. Most of it is in our mindset," opines actor Shefali. Relationship counselor Pradeep Singh admits, "It's all in the mind. If you are feeling good about yourself, it will reflect positively in your personality, thus giving a woman the necessary confidence will help her shed her inhibitions."

Highlight areas you love: "I know I am plump, but I like my eyes and long, silky hair. In bed, I use them to enhance my sex appeal," says Pooja Sharma, a legal executive. Accentuating your best physical attributes helps you to distract attention from certain features you are uncomfortable with. Concentrate more on the areas you are confident of. Delhi-based sexologist Reena Kapoor explains, "There is something unique in everyone that they happily flaunt. Most of the women I have spoken to think that men notice their flaws in bed, while the truth is that if she is able to display her parts well, the game is half won."

Accessorise yourself smartly: Discover the best ways to highlight or camouflage your quirks and get ready to radiate some bareness. You could accessorise yourself well to rightly compliment your nude play. Writer Richa Verma says, "I always dress to flatter my body by adorning it with high end accessories. A funky neck piece or a stiletto or even a scarf can do wonders.

Megha agrees. "I find nudity ugly. Sexy lingerie helps to a great extent." VJ Ranvijay supports, "I find a woman extremely sexy in boxer shorts. She need not necessarily be all nude to look sexy." Designer Neelam Nangia supports the claim. "Women who are shy of undressing can actually keep on a little piece of clothing to arouse male attention. Sexy lingerie does the trick here."

Try on beauty tricks: Clean your body of all hair mess; massage it with aromatic oils to add that alluring shine and aroma. Or spray a fragrance that goes well with your mood and more importantly your partner's. "I wear a deep, sensuous red lipstick shade to turn on my guy," expresses Smita Kulla, a team leader at an MNC. Beauty expert Samaira Sen says, "Get yourself pampered regularly, keep your body clean and also work out for a well toned body. You will yourself want your partner to see you nude."

Light the surroundings accurately: You might not want to have your room lit brightly when you are undressing. But you can have your surroundings lit unsensously with dim lights or scented candles. Give way to sunlight in the daytime or light some colored, aromatic candles in the night. "Women by nature are shy. They would not be easily initiated into being naked in bright light. Dim lights can steer your sensory organs and make you feel good about your body. You feel less inhibited," says sexologist Dr Swati Sharma. source

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That's a lovebite

A stamp of passion for some, while an embarrassing display of bedroom aggression for others, a scratched bruise often called a lovebite or a hicky is one aspect of lovemaking that is usually greeted with raised eyebrows!

Take Kareena Kapoor, who hogged the limelight for a mark on her back that apparently looked like a lovebite from Saif. And ultimately poor Bebo had to clear the air by stating that nobody gets a lovebite on their back. Well, no clue how many of her fans believed that explanation.

Like Bebo, many women prefer keeping the marks of passion under wraps, while there are others who get a high in putting them on display. Says Prachi Gupta, a Delhi-based research analyst, "I suppose deep down, every person wants to show off how satisfying his/her sex life is. And flaunting a lovebite is a straightforward way to tell the world about the passion a couple shares, which makes a girl feel more confident in her circle of friends."

Be it putting your active and passionate love life on display or just going with the trend of being a bold love-maker who doesn't mind giving a peep-show to those around – does it calls for such aggressive love making? Answers Mahinder Watsa, a sex expert, "Till both partners agree to be a part of sexual experimentation, it is normal. Some people are aggressive lovers, who don't mind biting and scratching their partners. But, if it hurts the other and leaves visible wounds – it calls for attention and warning as the aggression can leave the other partner jittery or rather disinterested in the act."

Sudipto Banerjee, a Mumbai-based advertising professional has a different take, "I think a lovebite is somewhere between sexual passion and sexual aggression – I call it possession. When I leave my girl with a prominent mark, I feel I have stamped her with my love. I take it as the display of my affection."

However, it's not necessary; your partner is as cool with the idea of getting a stamp of your love, which even hurts in some unfortunate cases. Deepika Mahajan, a Delhi-based-teacher who recently got married, didn't have a happy love experience with her husband. Says she, "My husband was in a habit of biting whenever passion rode high. Initially, I couldn't tell him as I thought he wouldn't like it but soon it became unbearable and I started having an aversion to lovemaking."

What should one do in such a situation? Answers Watsa, "It's possible that a partner gets too harsh at times in the height of excitement, but if this is regular, the other partner must raise their voice. Begin by politely explaining to your partner that his form of love is hurting you. Some people get enjoyment out of hurting their partner while lovemaking, which is a kind of disorder. So, if you see such tendencies in your partner, don't hesitate from getting psychological help before it gets too late."

If you make a couple who doesn't mind going with the flow and enjoy some aggression mixed with love, but at the same time are in no mood to get embarrassed by displaying those passionate marks, we have some quick tips to heal a love bite...

Dr. Anindita Vohra explains, "A love bite is an amassed patch of blood vessels that break open due to excessive sucking or nibbling on a region, which is usually temporary and subsides in some days. But still one can do some immediate treatments."

1. Apply ice: Wrap a few ice-cubes in a towel and apply it around the lovebite. This will prevent swelling in the area. Rubbing ice directly over the area can turn it into frostbite and darken the colour so avoid doing that.

2. Spoon effect: This calls for some preparation before lovemaking. Keep a spoon inside the freezer before you get into the act. And in case you get bitten, rub the chilled spoon on the effected area in circular motion. Repeat it again after a couple of hours. The process will help break the small blood clots under your skin and aid the healing process.

3. 'Wet' rid of marks: Once the wound/swelling/bruise is heeled, the next step is to get rid of the marks. For this, take some warm water. Dip a piece of cloth in it and press the cloth on the lovebite for a few minutes. This will open up the blood vessels facilitating flow of more blood in the area by lessening the redness. Make sure your lovebite has healed before you do this. source

Sex-guide according to your age

Our sexual behaviour varies at different times in our lives. Sex guru Tracey Cox in her bestselling book, 'Sextasy' reveals the sexual urges and traits of lovers according to their age...

20-something
Most guys just can't stop dreaming about sex every couple of hours. At this age, girls are usually rebellious in their sexual imaginations. They share same-sex fantasies or want to try out bi-sexuality. A 2006 study of nearly 2000 people discovered that 76 per cent of women who slept with women reached orgasm (for women with men, the figure stands at 50 per cent).
The 20s are the time when young boys and girls are most experimental in their sexual positions. One in 10 people claims Tracey Cox have had a threesome in their early twenties.

Also, people in this age group have most likely visited a strip joint or a lapdancing club - with their friends or their better half.

30 something
The 30s are a time to experiment, almost all 30-somethings claim to have had sex outdoors. Unlike the teens when making out was the most common form of sexual experimentation, most 30 somethings prefer having sex somewhere semi-public like the beach, in the garden or on a park bench in the darkness. There's something wildly erotic about these sexapades! Also, high on the 30 something popularity chart are having sex in the shower or in the bath tub.

Kinky pleasures also rate high as most 30 plus couples claim to be giving in to their fantasies of bondage, blindfolds and spanking on a weekend of debauchery.
This is also the time when women are most likely to befriend gay male pals. Straight women love gay men; gay men love straight women. Swedish research is confirming just why the two groups get along so famously - they both have symmetrical brains. Straight men and lesbians have asymmetrical brain hemispheres.

The 30s also mark the arrival of children in a married couple's life, so the sex drive naturally dwindles. But, Cox points out that during pregnancy, couples have sex four to five times a month. Most put the brakes on their sex lives for about seven weeks after delivery, but four months later are back to four or five times of sex a month. Cox says six months after delivery, the average couple goes back to having sex three to five times a month. But incase you don't fit the bill, remember getting disheartened ain't gonna help. Remember it's just a temporary period, so continue touching and cuddling and if your baby robs you of chances to have sex, indulge in quickies.

Most women says Cox in her book experience higher orgasm rates. Ninety per cent of women past 30 regularly experience orgasm, compared to just 23 per cent of younger women.

40 something
Men in their 40s are more likely to experience erection problems. Also, this is the age when maximum number of men tend to be unfaithful. Also, men are more compelled in their 40s to watch more porn or indulge in sex chats. Women on the other hand get sexually very demanding, often being attracted to younger men.

If you thought the 40s were about low libido, think again, while 40-somethings maybe having less sex than ever, the thrust has shifted from how many times in a week to an emphasis on better quality. You are more sure of your sexual needs in this age group and thus more likely to insist on passion play as opposed to a mere making out session. source

Major sex moments

The 'firsts' are always important moreso if you are in a relationship that means a lot to you.

The love firsts and milestones you share with your man are significant bonding moments between the two of you - especially when you add sex to the mix. We talked to a couple of people in a serious relationship, and asked them how sizzling was the sex they had either for the first time or after reaching a significant milestone in their relationship.

Read through other couples' monumental moments, then grab your guy and relive your own. Go for it, you can't get anything but lucky!

How was the sex after you said "I love you" for the first time?
"Incredible! My husband and I were school sweethearts, so he was my first and my one-and-only. Saying 'I love you' was a very big deal, and it led to the first time we had sex. It was exciting, adventurous, and scary all at the same time! It's incredible to think that it was the beginning of the making of our love story."
- Ruchika, 36, Mumbai

"After my guy and I exchanged those magical three words, the sex was like a giant explosion of waves."

- Neera, 33, Delhi

After your wedding?
"Interrupted. My husband and I had spent our wedding dancing and talking to guests, so we hadn't eaten a thing. When we got back to our hotel room, we ordered cheeseburgers, then forgot about them and started to get busy. Mid-act, we heard a knock on the door. We put the sex on hold while we chowed down. It wasn't very sexy, but our stomachs thanked us!"
- Anjali, 26, Hyderabad

"My husband and I made love as though we had been two animals in heat, caged beside each other for days. There was a feeling of freedom and a need to get inside each other. We stopped for the night in a hotel on our way to Gurgaon, but ended up staying several nights because we couldn't leave the room!"
- Babita, 44, Gurgaon

After you moved into your first home?
"Simply amazing. I think we christened every room of the house!"
- Leela, 44, Delhi

My husband and I had so longed for a house of our own, that when we finally had it, we couldn't believe it. After the pooja of the house was over, and all the guests had left, we ripped the clothes of each other and headed straight to the bedroom. Needless to say, the sex was awesome. We didn't even spare the balcony! The terrace is next!
- Radha, 32, Kolkata source

Types of men women hate

here might be ample qualities that make men irresistible. But women being the fairer sex have created certain stereotypes in men that they would never want to be seen with.

We list the most common kinds of men that women love to hate...

Thumbs down to dominant men : Gone are the days when a male dominated society used to be the way of life. So, if the next time you try to show your superiority in front of your girl, it might land you in a tight spot. Women prefer mates who're recognized by their peers for their skills, abilities, and achievements – and not those who use coercive tactics to subordinate their rivals, reveals a new study.

Expert says : Dr. Chirta Bakshi, a relationship counsellor says, "Dominant behaviour is highly opposed by a female partner as she wants to enjoy the bond with equal respect. In any relationship, if one partner tries to have the upper hand in taking all decisions and if they portray their dominant self, it will not do any good to that relationship."

Macho guys aren't always lucky : A macho guy with an angry young man personality might look good on silver screen, but when it comes to real life, women aren't game to hang around with macho dudes. A recent study claims that macho guys don't always get the girls. The study further revealed that the most aggressive guys ended up with fewer wives and children.

Expert says : Personality development expert Varun Chhabra says, "Women today are more keen to pick a guy who flaunts a good body combined with a metro sexual image rather than the typical rough and tough hunk. Men who look tough from the outside and bear a soft heart within are women's favourite."

Keep sex starved men at bay : Men are usually sexually more charged up. But when it comes to choosing a mate, women don't opt for a sexually ravenous partner. This is maybe because for such men, sex is the top priority in the relationship whereas the woman continuously seeks love and romance, sans physical intimacy.

Expert says : Relationship and sex counsellor Dr. Geetu Bhardwaj shares, "It's not that women are not keen to have sex with their partner, but a man's sexual inclination does plan an important role when it comes to choosing their partner. Women generally aren't too comfortable with the idea of being with a man who has sex on his mind throughout the day. In such relationships, things like understanding and love are secondary and sexual intimacy is all that matters for the male partner."

Chauvinism is out completely : Remember Bobby Deol's chauvinistic character in Dostana, which was enough to drive his lady nuts. An excess of anything is bad. Women don't find a chauvinistic man a great companion to spend the rest of their lives with.

Expert says : Dr. Ratan Kumar, a clinical psychologist asserts, "There is a very thin line of demarcation between being a gentleman and chauvinist. A girl might love your care and concern, but your over chauvinistic attitude may irritate her at times. Make an attempt to give enough space to her and let the comfort zone be there as per mutual convenience."

Using slangs won't take you anywhere : Using abusive lingo every time you indulge in a conversation might lend you a cool dude look cool in front of your male peers, but girls don't want to hang around with a abusive man. Being too abusive and stressing on using slangs too often is a 'turn off' for today's women.

Expert says : Psychiatrist Dr. Anupam Randhawa states, "Men need to realise that a woman would like to be associated with a respectful and well-behaved mate. So using excess of slang language and abusive words during conversations can backfire. The reason why women keep such partners at bay is because they find it offensive when their man gets abusive as it comes as a gesture of disrespect to the relationship." source

Endure a sex marathon

Not very often does one get the opportunity to spend extended lovemaking time with their lover, but when such rare occasion does arise one should make it a point to keep it enjoyable as well as enduring.

Enduring a sex marathon can take a few hours or longer if the situation demands it, and many times it could go all night.

Thus, to keep oneself in good form, even the most virile and energetic must rest and rejuvenate, reports Fox News.

Before embarking on your sex marathon, it is better to be well-fed (but not too well) with food that releases energy slowly (such as grains and low GI carbohydrates) and be well hydrated.

And here are some tips on enduring a sex marathon:

Don't orgasm
You can do this by choosing positions that provide less stimulation - because everyone is different, only you will know what these are for you. Change positions if you feel like you're losing the power of your drive and erection or getting too close to orgasm. Bear in mind that having an orgasm isn't the end of the session and you can take a rest before you continue. This is a good time to experiment with positions that you may not have tried with your partner.

Pleasure her to keep the focus off of you
If you do happen to need a rest while enduring a sex marathon or you do orgasm, you can easily shift the focus off of you and onto her. This can include cuddling, fondling, massage, general touching, and kissing. A rest does not have to be totally sexual in nature, and it is just as nice to make love for hours as it is to just touch each other in nice ways - or invent new ways of loving.

Don't drink too much
Alcohol is known to be a relaxant and can be a wonderful addition to the time you share with your lover. In saying that, after two or more drinks, alcohol lowers a man's ability to achieve and maintain erections, and can trigger an inability to orgasm for a long time. Alcohol also has sedative effects - it could cause you to fall asleep easily. Drinking can also encourage unsafe behaviour. Drinking too much alcohol will not help enduring a sex marathon.

Get creative
While enduring a sex marathon, you can introduce sex toys like vibrators, beads or sex paraphernalia such as whips, ropes and blindfolds. Food is also a great diversion and pleasure- ice cream, chocolate sauce or whipped cream are great. Get creative - you can draw out the process for quite some time with some very lusty teasing using these objects.

Keep lube handy
One of the main problems of sex play for hours could be dryness, so keep some good quality lubricant handy, one that tastes nice and is non-greasy. A glass of water nearby is also going to be useful, not only to rehydrate but to moisten your mouth. source

Condom May Become thing of past

It may be time for men to split the contraceptive burden with women, for Scottish scientists have come up with a new 'Pill' that drastically reduces sperm count in men.

Professor Richard Anderson, from Edinburgh University, is on the look out for men willing to try the revolutionary hormone injections, containing progesterone and testosterone, to be given in the bum every two months.

The researcher believes that the contraceptive treatment works better than condoms, and is as effective as the female Pill.

"If this trial is successful I imagine there would be interest in looking at marketing the injection as a male contraceptive," the Sun quoted Anderson as saying.

"The surveys we have done have been very positive - and particularly positive from women. A lot of women who have taken on the reproductive and contraceptive burden think it's maybe time men took their turn.

"Even if not all men would be keen on an injection, there would definitely be a market to make such a treatment available," he added.

Anderson further said that no serious side-effects had been predicted from the year-long trial, run by the World Health Organisation. The effects of the injections were also assured to be fully reversible.

A spokesman from the Family Planning Association said: "It is important that research continues to try to give men more contraceptive choice. But it is crucial that any new contraceptive is rigorously tested to make sure that it is incredibly safe and effective." Source:The times of India

First Night Sex

The first time you have sex, it's not all smooth sailing. In fact, many fears are attached to it. Dr Mahinder Watsa tells you what to expect (and what not to expect) the first time you get intimate with someone.

There'll be many a slip
Everybody wants their first time to be perfect. Some even envision it to be some kind of fairytale moment. Nothing wrong with that, but one should know that there could be slip-ups, all the same. The man often wishes intercourse to last longer, but if he achieves orgasm early (presumably due to a rush of excitement), it is okay! Some may even fail to achieve an erection and in that moment of disappointment, label themselves as not being 'up to the mark'. If that is what you think, it is a big mistake. You can always end the session with ample foreplay. If things don't go as planned in the very first time, there's always a second time. If a man can achieve an erection during masturbation, he is normal. So just relax and go with the flow.

Yes, it hurts, but wait
For women, the first time can be a little painful, but hang on. It's not the pain that they must dread. In most cases, the pain is almost like that of finger prick. However, it's the fear of pain that makes things worse. The hype surrounding the pain often induces fear in women, resulting in spasms at the slightest touch. This is where it is important for the partner to step in. Firstly, ensure she feels comfortable with you. Ample foreplay is a must to get the vagina lubricated. Start with inserting a finger to rupture the hymen,
and then slowly, proceed towards intercourse. The key is to take it slow.

Bleeding? Maybe. Maybe not
That a woman must bleed during her first intercourse is undoubtedly the most misguided notion people harbour. The bleeding occurs when the hymen splits. However, why is it so difficult to understand that the same hymen which is considered a mark of virginity by many men can also split due to other reasons? Rigorous exercises such as cycling can split the hymen. In some cases, it may even be congenitally absent. The hymen can also rupture, when women masturbate. Bleeding, or no bleeding, the fact that you are close enough to your partner to get sexually intimate demands you also put a certain level of trust in her. Doubts, if any, should be cleared right in the beginning, and not in the bed.

Contraception can fail
One wrong move is enough to invite unwanted pregnancy. Don't rely on withdrawal method or the safe days of the woman's menstrual cycle. Unmarried couples must use condoms. If marriage is around the corner, the woman can visit her gynaecologist a month before the wedding. The doctor will put her on oral contraceptives, safe enough to see the couple through the honeymoon phase. Later, the couple can consult the gynaecologist and select the contraceptive method that suits them the best.

It will get messy
When body fluids are exchanged, it can get quite messy. But there are no two ways about it. Either you do it, or you don't. So don't fret too much about unwanted stains and keep an extra sheet handy. Source:The times of India

How to de-stress your sex-life

Do you feel that stress is squeezing the fun out of your bedroom life?

How to make your life stress-free (Getty Images)

If yes, then you can bring back the action, courtesy tips provided by sex educator and relationship expert Dr. Yvonne Kristin Fulbright. According to the expert, many couples become frustrated, even panicky, when their sex lives go to the wayside during stressful times. When it comes to the factor that governs a person's sex life, it's personality, reports Fox News.

Fulbright says that how an individual's sex life fares depends on whether he tries to get closer to his partner in tragic times or wants to be totally alone and if he's the withdrawing sorts, then it can create misunderstandings in the relationship.

In order to avoid any such misunderstandings and still keep sex life full of fun and passion, Fulbright has suggested that couples need to establish a common ground and mutual understanding during stressful times.

Also, they should make an effort to stay connected during life's highs and lows, because if they don't, it could lead to dire consequences. And in case, sex is not on mind and also the time to be spent in the sack is less, then a person can try the following:

1. Showing appreciation for one another. Giving compliments, for example, is a simple way of expressing affection and letting your partner know that he or she is still being noticed and loved.

2. Talking daily. Chat during dinner or at bedtime. Conversations foster bonding by providing support. It's also important for couples to check in with each other, showing concern and care for one another's well-being with simple statements like, "Tell me about your day."

3. Staying positive . Bite your tongue if you're about to complain. Stressful situations are hard enough to deal with. Don't add to it if you can avoid doing so.

4. Believing in your future together. Stressful times can make lovers doubt their ability to stay together for the long haul. Insecurity issues that arise can only make matters more difficult. Making plans is one way to indicate that you're feeling secure about your future.

5. Helping each other with responsibilities . Approaching tasks with a team effort provides a greater sense of being in 'this' together.

6. Balancing 'alone time' and 'together time.' Create a sensual atmosphere, for example, soothing scents, dim lights, delicious food, and relaxing music to help you unwind.

7. Getting creative in how you'll be intimate . Redefine your definition of sexual intimacy when needed; try a simple body massage.

Not to forget, lovers should make it a point to give in to one another's requests for intimacy whenever possible, as it might just prove to be a big stress-buster. In fact, sex has many physical and emotional benefits, which may help in boosting your desire for more sex and emotional intimacy. Sex can easily take your mind off of your worries.

Also, patience is the key to get your sex life back on track. One should make sure that your relationship, in general, doesn't get neglected. Source:timesofindia.indiatimes

Top ten sex romps

Are you always complaining that your sex life is running out of steam? Well, what's stopping you from getting adventurous and innovative? Charge up your sex life using this list of the 10 craziest places to fool around...or you could get inspired and think of a few of your own!

1. On the couch: After the bed, the couch in the living room is screaming for attention. And the best part...it's comfy too. The cushions work as a support system to get those curves and arches to enjoy the perfect moves, while the lack of space will keep up the intimacy levels. Want some more action? Put on a wild flick on video and you have a perfect mood maker!
Word of caution: Watch out your moves, going out of control is injurious...for the couch of course!

2. In the bathtub: Things can get real hot even in a cool bath tub. For the ultimate romantic experience, arrange for a bubble bath with aromatic rose petals and passion perfume. Add some mood lighting, splash a few drops of 'ylang ylang' essential oil and be certain that the sensuous experiment will lead to some supah hot sex.
Word of caution: Check out the water temperature, you don't want to end up with painful blisters or a frozen lover...isn't?

3. In the kitchen: Be it 91/2 Weeks or Fatal Attraction , the kitchen has borne witness to quite a number of sexapades. The sturdy surfaces and shelves offer great support, especially for stand-up acts, while the feeling of being at an unconventional place pumps up the excitement to newer heights. And how can you miss the yummy treats your kitchen is loaded with? Eat them, but off each other's hot bods. Think chocolate, cream, jams and jellies!
Word of caution: Know the stuff you are eating and applying...some edibles are good only to eat. So watch out for allergies!

4. In the pool: Though not many are privileged to have one in the confines of their home, if you are one of the lucky few, make the most of it. Challenge your swimming skills and get under for into some underwater escapades. Who said that the inflatable water turtle is meant only for tanning, use it for some steamy adventure...ride it together and get a new high!
Word of caution: You need not be swimming champs, but fairly decent floating skills are definitely expected to get into the water-y fun.

5. In the car: Yes it's crammed, but it's cosy too. A quickie in the backseat can rekindle the excitement that you felt during your heady college days. Put on some romantic retro tracks and switch on the AC. Don't fret, it won't cool down the passion. When the place is different, the position can't be a drab. It's tough to adjust facing each other, but turning the world around can definitely help...hope you got the clue!
Word of caution: Just be careful where you park...you don't want to get busted!

6. In the dressing room: How about catching her unawares in the dressing room of a store? Sounds dangerous but thrilling too! The fear of getting caught will only add to the sensual experience, while the lack of time is perfect to give you a never before quickie. Thinking comfort? Sorry! All you have is a stool...let him stand as you take charge!
Word of caution: Making noise is not allowed here and do take care of hidden cameras and key-holes.

7. The stairs: If you are thinking they can be a pain to one's body, think again, as they can be adventurous too. After all, they can give you those highs and lows, especially when the girl is comparatively short.
Word of caution: Don't get really aggressive if getting cramps in your lower back is not on your mind.

8. On the roof : Yes, this can be a great playground; the gentle moonlight, a cool breeze to caress your passionate entwinings. Pep it up with some paper lamps or scented candles and light music, which will just add to the mood. You have all the space to set the ball rolling...so go ahead and explore her contours under a starry sky.
Word of caution: No physical risks are involved...but just take care of peeping Toms around.

9. In a sleeping bag: Nothing could bring you as close as that sleeping bag that's meant for a single person and is loaded with two! Why not get into some naughty action and add to a fun-filled camping trip? Instead of the normal position, turn around and have some fun from behind. Talk about kinky fantasies!
Word of caution: Zip the bag properly, you don't want end up killing insects in the mid of the act.

10. On a plane: You can try the toilet and if that's too cramped, the seat in a Business or First class cabin. Some airliners with long-haul flights now boast of recliner seats that go as flat as a bed. Take a flight of fantasy.
Word of caution: Don't try it if you already have flight phobia and take care of people lining-up outside the loo. Source:timesofindia.indiatimes

Extra Marital Affairs

The 1st Affair:

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.
One day they went her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.
He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
"I can't lie to you," he replied, "I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon."

"You lying bastard!
You've been playing golf!"

The 2nd Affair:

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son.
They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.
He told his wife, "There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied, "Not this time!"

The 3rd Affair:

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner."

She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder.
"Don't move until I tell you," she said. "Pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh it's a statue." she replied. "The Smith's bought one and I liked it so much I got one for us, too."

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.
Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer.

"Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smith's and nobody offered me a damned thing."

The 4th Affair:

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.
"Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent."

"One Cent?" the man thought.
He glanced at the menu and asked, "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?"

"A nickel," the barman replied.
"A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The bartender replied, "Upstairs, with my wife."
The man asked, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"

The bartender replied,
"The same thing I'm doing to his business down here."

The 5th Affair:

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.
He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."

"There's no need to," his wife replied.
"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"

"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."

Wishful Thinking

Gwen was one of those UGLY women, so she never had a boyfriend.

So she went to a psychic for help.



Honey! - said the psychic. You will not have luck in love in this life.

But after death, you will be a much desired woman and all men will fall at

your feet.



Gwen left very happy and so excited, as she went over a bridge she

thought: "The sooner I die, the sooner my next life begins"

She decided to jump off the bridge right away.

But, incredibly Gwen didn't die!

She fell on the back of a truck full of bananas; she lost her senses and fainted.

As soon as she recovered, still drowsy and not being able to see very well,

and not knowing where she was, she started touching her surroundings.

Feeling all the bananas she mumbled with a huge smile on her face and

said:

"GENTLEMEN, PLEASE!,... ONE AT A TIME!"

Extra Marital Affairs

The 1st Affair:

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.
One day they went her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.
He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
"I can't lie to you," he replied, "I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon."

"You lying bastard!
You've been playing golf!"

The 2nd Affair:

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son.
They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.
He told his wife, "There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied, "Not this time!"

The 3rd Affair:

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner."

She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder.
"Don't move until I tell you," she said. "Pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh it's a statue." she replied. "The Smith's bought one and I liked it so much I got one for us, too."

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.
Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer.

"Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smith's and nobody offered me a damned thing."

The 4th Affair:

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.
"Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent."

"One Cent?" the man thought.
He glanced at the menu and asked, "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?"

"A nickel," the barman replied.
"A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The bartender replied, "Upstairs, with my wife."
The man asked, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"

The bartender replied,
"The same thing I'm doing to his business down here."

The 5th Affair:

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.
He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."

"There's no need to," his wife replied.
"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"

"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."

3 Newly Married Daughters

A Mother had 3 virgin daughters.

They were all getting married within a short time
period. Because Mom was a bit worried about how their sex life would
get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a
few words on how marital sex felt.

The first girl sent a card from Hawaii two days after
the wedding.

The card said nothing but: "Nescafe"!

Mom was puzzled at first, but then went to her
kitchen and got out the Nescafe jar.

Nescafe Rich Blend Coffee, 475g It said: "Good till
the last drop".

Mom blushed, but was pleased for her daughter.

The second girl sent the card from Vermont a week
after the wedding, and the card read: "Rothmans"

 

Mom now knew to go straight to her husband's
cigarettes, and she read from the pack:

"Extra Long. King Size"

She was again slightly embarrassed but still happy
for her daughter.

The third girl left for her honeymoon in
Cape Town. Mom waited for a week, nothing. Another
week went by and still nothing. Then after a whole
month, a card finally arrived. Written on it with
shaky handwriting were the
words "Air Pacific"

Mom took out her latest Fiji Living magazine, flipped
through the pages fearing the worst, and finally found
the ad for AP.
The ad said:

"Ten times a day, seven days a week, both ways."

Mom fainted!.

Tips to lure a woman

Finding it hard to land a date? Well, Sydney writer Sam de Brito's new book, 'Building a Better Bloke' might just help.

Brito has admitted that he has had his share of dud dates - partly because his past approach to dating involved getting drunk. But now, he has made a few adjustments when it comes to luring the opposite sex. And he has urged other men to do the same in his new book.

"I'm not trying to teach men how to be a pick-up artist or a stud, I want to show men how to build self-esteem, build a life for themselves - which in turn will attract women," the Courier Mail quoted Brito, as saying.

According to the 39-year-old, his generation has lost the art of communicating with women. "Guys have fallen through the cracks. We like to think of men as bold and confident and a lot of them aren't," he said.

He said that for some, the biggest fear in life is approaching and striking up a conversation with a woman. In this case, he has suggested practice and a sense of humour is the key. The catch phrase of his book is: "Find a life and you'll find love". "The biggest thing is not to look cool, but to have a life with lots of interests. Get involved in your life, look after yourself, and you're primed to meet someone," he said.

He said that good manners and keeping clean are also important. "Be a gentleman. Respect yourself. Even if you're funny and charming, you're not going to get far with a woman if you smell," he said.

Besides clean sheets and clean fingernails, Building a Better Bloke also reminds men of the simple things, like holding a door open for women.

So, the ten tips to lure a woman are:

Stay healthy
Don't abuse alcohol or drugs
Have a job that means something to you
Be busy with your own activities
Be well groomed and clean
Have a sense of humour
Talk to women as individuals, not as a gender
Be a gentleman
Don't mix with loser friends.
Have a clean bedroom, clean sheets - and a lamp to create romantic lighting Source:timesofindia.indiatimes.com

Spicier vacation sex

Want to pep up your love life? Well, then all you need to do is plan a 'vacation' sex with your partner, for it can do wonders for your heart, mind, and soul, according to a new research.

Sex on a holiday allows you to get away from pressures, distractions, worries and responsibilities — basically, any of those libido-killers that affect your love life most days of the year, reports the Daily Telegraph

While on vacation, you can totally devote yourself to nurturing your sexual needs and desires — and to attending to those of your lover.

This is one of the reasons the vast majority of American marriage counsellors recommend a regular weekend away as the one thing that can help a marriage, especially a struggling one.

Vacation is the best place to get 'sexperimental'. People love having sex in new places. This is in large part because of the neurotransmitter dopamine.

When people have new experiences, dopamine spikes in the brain, triggering lust. And with that, many are willing to try something new and exciting.

In a new, romantic, or exotic place, lovers can rediscover one another. In trying different restaurants or embarking on a variety of nightlife activities, every evening that you're away feels like a date night, each with its own distinct backdrop.

All of this enhances lovers' moods, helping them to feel better about one another and more connected.

When you make the time for nothing but loving, that's hopefully what you're going to get – and lots of it.

Sex will breed the desire for more sex, making both partners feel better about their sex life and the relationship.

This is both for couples already content with their sex life and those hoping their vacation will make for some romance repair.
Source:timesofindia.indiatimes.com