What women think while having sex?

A Hollywood hunk, ex-lovers, a blue film scene and even what to buy in a grocery store—these are things that women think of while having sex.

Some women have now revealed what really scores with them between the sheets.

Single comedian Shazia Mirza, 34, said that some of her friends revealed that during sex they are mentally writing a to-do list, remembering clothes they have to wash, what they've got to buy at Tesco's or those shoes they love in Selfridges.

And some women even think of men they secretly fantasise of.

"A friend of mine, who really loves her husband, told me that during sex she can't help thinking about all the men she secretly really desires, like Jeremy Beadle and Jeremy Paxman," the Sun quoted her as saying.

"I've been married twice and had many lovers and to be honest, with past lovers I've been so bored in bed, I've taken to compiling mental grocery lists and calculating exactly how many shoes are in the wardrobe (82 pairs)," said author Kathy Lette, 51.

"Most wives are taken for granted. But how we'd like to be taken is by a muscular-thighed Adonis with pecs appeal.

"Luckily sex with Johnny Depp is only the flick of a light switch away. Ah, Johnny - a man whose sex appeal is so deadly it should be registered at police headquarters as a lethal weapon.

"Doing the horizontal tango with George Clooney is also amazing - if only he'd been with me at the time!" she added.

Sarah Millican, 33, is in a relationship, and she said: "I never walk out of a film at the cinema. I'm the same with sex. I always think it might get better. To be honest, as long as I've got a bag of Maltesers, I'm not going anywhere." source

Celebs who posed nude

Nakedness is still a very hush hush thing for lot of actresses to be portrayed on and off the screen. But there are babes who have no qualms about it. Have a look...

Eva Mendes: The sexy actress has posed nude for a noble cause for PETA and also to promote the fragrance 'Secret Obsession'Source:Times of India

 

Tips to up your sexual power

Try as you might, you can't escape it. Sex dominates everything — the media, our movies and drawing room conversations.

One of the most respected management guru Abraham Maslow's famous hierarchy of needs theory places sex at the very first level along with breathing, food, water, excretion, homeostasis and sleep. So lack of good sex can be directly equated with the effects of lack of good sleep or even a failure to have a good 'session' one morning!

A good sex life is part and parcel of healthy living. And what does this mean? It implies satisfaction with your partner and feeling sexually adequate. Also, a person who has a good sex life has good self-esteem and falls into the "I'm ok, you're ok category".

Scorch the bed
Interestingly, whether in Mumbai, Delhi, LA or Bangkok, most people who 'get lucky' assume that they are good in bed. That is, they believe they are able to satisfy their partners completely while satisfying themselves. But more than getting action, having a good sex life also means being able to last long enough to share a wonderful journey and yet not last so long that the journey turns into a punishment for the partner!

So what does it take to excel in bed as in other areas of life? As always, manwoman dynamics differ here too. While both have the need to be satiated, both take different routes for getting there. While a woman can have multiple orgasms and continue to have sex even after she's exhausted, a man normally goes limp after he orgasms. So for a man, being able to last long enough to satisfy his partner is the primary concern.

Also, don't get carried away by the 'quantity' factor. It's quality that matters. Sex needn't be restricted to contortions and gymnastics in bed or in the sweaty back seat of a car. It's also not just about the act. Sexuality starts from the moment of first contact (even if it's just eye contact) and continues throughout the relationship for how many ever minutes, hours, weeks, months, years or decades it may last.

Spice it up, dude
So how do you ensure your sex life is always rocking? Just remember these tips...
Look fit: A toned physique is undoubtedly the most potent turn-on. Even before the love-making session begins, the sight of toned abs, strong thighs and muscular arms makes you sexually desirable to your partner and starts the fire burning. Those who maintain a toned physique normally have higher confidence levels.

Be fit: A person who is fit is bound to have higher levels of stamina, strength, vitality and vigour than an unfit person. This is sure to catapult your sex life and even lead to higher satisfaction levels, for you and your partner alike. Obesity is one of the key physical reasons for erectile dysfunction. Therefore a fit person stands a better chance of satisfying his / her partner.

De-stress: Stress is one of the biggest killers of a healthy sex life as it leads to many problems, right from reduced stamina to simply not being in mood. So stay stress free. Remember, any problem is only as big as you allow it to be.

Eat right: Good sex demands a healthy diet with adequate zinc and proteins. Zinc is known for its aphrodisiac properties. Eat your way to a sizzling sex life with a diet rich in asparagus, onions, garlic and bananas.

Smell good: Aromas have the magical property of making your brain explode with sensations and feelings. Make sure you smell good at all times. If not for anything else, body odour and bad breath are repulsive to most people.

Dress well: Admit it, we are visual by nature. We always believe in what we see. So dress well, packaging is important. Don't forget the little details like nail polish, earrings, lipstick etc. Men, please don't ignore your accessories either. Most women tend to look at men's shoes very carefully.

Experiment: Don't restrict yourself in bed, experiment freely with your partner. If your partner suggests something you've never heard or dreamt off before, don't shoot down the idea harshly, it may stop him or her from giving any future suggestions. Explore each other with reckless abandon. It keeps the magic alive and the relationship ticking for years together.

Be genuine: Most of us are capable of identifying fake interest from the real thing. So be genuine in every aspect, it genuinely helps!

The always 'in' look
Ever noticed that the hottest male stars / models, etc normally appear hairless? Ever wondered why? The answer is simple: In pure marketing terms, their target audience is the female viewer. They appear hairless simply because it makes them look better and enhances their sex appeal.

So, while your demure Indian girl may never tell you this directly, do consider that just as you may like to see your woman hairless, smelling good, dressed well and fat free, your woman may also like to see you clean shaven, hairless, smelling good, well dressed, with a great body and dressed up just for her! What say, girls? source

Naked ?

How comfortable are you with nakedness? If not much, we share some easy tips to make you feel comfortable with nakedness!

You love to flaunt your body, but the need to be perceived as sexy sometimes leaves you insecure and vulnerable inside. Even the most confident woman is most often a bit uncomfortable with her body.

Model Megha Kawale agrees, "There is no woman in this world who is happy and content with her body. She's always complaining and every woman goes through the same insecurity. Earlier if someone used to catch me in a bikini, I would squirm. I used to call it a half naked shot."

With couples getting more health conscious these days, many don't mind going buff in front of their partner, but when it comes to public view, they shy away.

Take the case of actor Shefali Zariwala, who divulges, "I am otherwise very comfortable with my body and I do like to check myself out when I am alone by baring it all. I love to be in my natural state at home when I am alone, but forget the camera."

Women know very well that for men, what they see is almost as good as what they get. So we know giving them an eyeful is the trick to seduce them, yet most women fret getting naked in front of their beaus.

Marketing manager Gaurav Sharma says, "If a woman lets you see her naked, I feel that's already a bonus. I would feel blessed if that happens, but none of my girlfriends ever gave me that pleasure of admiring their bodies. I remember one of them even started crying when I put on the lights right after we made out."

Here are a few ways to make you could feel comfortable with nakedness in front of your partner...

Think good thoughts: Whether or not you want to undress depends on your mental quotient. Your state of your mind rules your sex appeal. One can feel attractive even in the most hideous dress, if the mind is in a confident and happy state. "When you yourself feel sexy, that's when all the magic happens," says Megha.

"A guy is very much responsible for making a girl feel sexy. Most of it is in our mindset," opines actor Shefali. Relationship counselor Pradeep Singh admits, "It's all in the mind. If you are feeling good about yourself, it will reflect positively in your personality, thus giving a woman the necessary confidence will help her shed her inhibitions."

Highlight areas you love: "I know I am plump, but I like my eyes and long, silky hair. In bed, I use them to enhance my sex appeal," says Pooja Sharma, a legal executive. Accentuating your best physical attributes helps you to distract attention from certain features you are uncomfortable with. Concentrate more on the areas you are confident of. Delhi-based sexologist Reena Kapoor explains, "There is something unique in everyone that they happily flaunt. Most of the women I have spoken to think that men notice their flaws in bed, while the truth is that if she is able to display her parts well, the game is half won."

Accessorise yourself smartly: Discover the best ways to highlight or camouflage your quirks and get ready to radiate some bareness. You could accessorise yourself well to rightly compliment your nude play. Writer Richa Verma says, "I always dress to flatter my body by adorning it with high end accessories. A funky neck piece or a stiletto or even a scarf can do wonders.

Megha agrees. "I find nudity ugly. Sexy lingerie helps to a great extent." VJ Ranvijay supports, "I find a woman extremely sexy in boxer shorts. She need not necessarily be all nude to look sexy." Designer Neelam Nangia supports the claim. "Women who are shy of undressing can actually keep on a little piece of clothing to arouse male attention. Sexy lingerie does the trick here."

Try on beauty tricks: Clean your body of all hair mess; massage it with aromatic oils to add that alluring shine and aroma. Or spray a fragrance that goes well with your mood and more importantly your partner's. "I wear a deep, sensuous red lipstick shade to turn on my guy," expresses Smita Kulla, a team leader at an MNC. Beauty expert Samaira Sen says, "Get yourself pampered regularly, keep your body clean and also work out for a well toned body. You will yourself want your partner to see you nude."

Light the surroundings accurately: You might not want to have your room lit brightly when you are undressing. But you can have your surroundings lit unsensously with dim lights or scented candles. Give way to sunlight in the daytime or light some colored, aromatic candles in the night. "Women by nature are shy. They would not be easily initiated into being naked in bright light. Dim lights can steer your sensory organs and make you feel good about your body. You feel less inhibited," says sexologist Dr Swati Sharma. source

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That's a lovebite

A stamp of passion for some, while an embarrassing display of bedroom aggression for others, a scratched bruise often called a lovebite or a hicky is one aspect of lovemaking that is usually greeted with raised eyebrows!

Take Kareena Kapoor, who hogged the limelight for a mark on her back that apparently looked like a lovebite from Saif. And ultimately poor Bebo had to clear the air by stating that nobody gets a lovebite on their back. Well, no clue how many of her fans believed that explanation.

Like Bebo, many women prefer keeping the marks of passion under wraps, while there are others who get a high in putting them on display. Says Prachi Gupta, a Delhi-based research analyst, "I suppose deep down, every person wants to show off how satisfying his/her sex life is. And flaunting a lovebite is a straightforward way to tell the world about the passion a couple shares, which makes a girl feel more confident in her circle of friends."

Be it putting your active and passionate love life on display or just going with the trend of being a bold love-maker who doesn't mind giving a peep-show to those around – does it calls for such aggressive love making? Answers Mahinder Watsa, a sex expert, "Till both partners agree to be a part of sexual experimentation, it is normal. Some people are aggressive lovers, who don't mind biting and scratching their partners. But, if it hurts the other and leaves visible wounds – it calls for attention and warning as the aggression can leave the other partner jittery or rather disinterested in the act."

Sudipto Banerjee, a Mumbai-based advertising professional has a different take, "I think a lovebite is somewhere between sexual passion and sexual aggression – I call it possession. When I leave my girl with a prominent mark, I feel I have stamped her with my love. I take it as the display of my affection."

However, it's not necessary; your partner is as cool with the idea of getting a stamp of your love, which even hurts in some unfortunate cases. Deepika Mahajan, a Delhi-based-teacher who recently got married, didn't have a happy love experience with her husband. Says she, "My husband was in a habit of biting whenever passion rode high. Initially, I couldn't tell him as I thought he wouldn't like it but soon it became unbearable and I started having an aversion to lovemaking."

What should one do in such a situation? Answers Watsa, "It's possible that a partner gets too harsh at times in the height of excitement, but if this is regular, the other partner must raise their voice. Begin by politely explaining to your partner that his form of love is hurting you. Some people get enjoyment out of hurting their partner while lovemaking, which is a kind of disorder. So, if you see such tendencies in your partner, don't hesitate from getting psychological help before it gets too late."

If you make a couple who doesn't mind going with the flow and enjoy some aggression mixed with love, but at the same time are in no mood to get embarrassed by displaying those passionate marks, we have some quick tips to heal a love bite...

Dr. Anindita Vohra explains, "A love bite is an amassed patch of blood vessels that break open due to excessive sucking or nibbling on a region, which is usually temporary and subsides in some days. But still one can do some immediate treatments."

1. Apply ice: Wrap a few ice-cubes in a towel and apply it around the lovebite. This will prevent swelling in the area. Rubbing ice directly over the area can turn it into frostbite and darken the colour so avoid doing that.

2. Spoon effect: This calls for some preparation before lovemaking. Keep a spoon inside the freezer before you get into the act. And in case you get bitten, rub the chilled spoon on the effected area in circular motion. Repeat it again after a couple of hours. The process will help break the small blood clots under your skin and aid the healing process.

3. 'Wet' rid of marks: Once the wound/swelling/bruise is heeled, the next step is to get rid of the marks. For this, take some warm water. Dip a piece of cloth in it and press the cloth on the lovebite for a few minutes. This will open up the blood vessels facilitating flow of more blood in the area by lessening the redness. Make sure your lovebite has healed before you do this. source